“Be tough. Bounce back. Don’t just survive. Go beyond survival.” —Retired Navy Pilot Captain Jerry Coffee.
On the plane leaving Honolulu. I sat next to a couple. The wife, husband, then me in the aisle. They were stopping in Houston for a day to see her cousin. Then flying to Washington DC to visit her daughter and grandkids. Then onto Johns Hopkins, my alma mater, for his medical treatment. Our chats fluttered back and forth.
Then Susan chimed in that her husband had served in the military. That he was imprisoned and tortured in North Viet Nam for seven years. In Hoala Hoa, dubbed as the Hilton Hanoi. Susan told me that the late Senator John McCain had been one of his cell mates and they had attended his funeral recently.
Her husband had also flown reconnaissance planes over Cuba.
Oh, and he had written a book.
What struck me was that Jerry Coffee didn’t talk about himself much. About other things, but not about his achievements or accomplishments.
We talked about kids, family, education, where we lived. Ordinary life.
We also talked about my grandfather. He had been imprisoned and tortured in North Viet Nam as well.
One of the Communist’ means of torture for my grandfather was to bash his cranium against any hard surfaces nearby which included the table, floors, walls, or all the above. Until he passed out.
He lost a big chunk of his hearing in both ears. To this day, even with his hearing aids, my kids have to shout for him to hear.
We shared stories. My grandfather? I don’t think I had spoken about his torture to anyone outside the family.
We shared history. The Tet Defensive. Jerry gave me the name of a Vietnamese restaurant in Virginia to check out. Every year, on the anniversary of the Tet Defensive. POWs in the nearby area gather at that restaurant for a meal, to unite and remember.
The Vietnamese owner has since passed the restaurant on to his son, says Jerry. He urged me to go eat there.
Oh yes. Jerry remembered I was flying to Washington DC in a few days.
Small talk like this. It was like talking to my grandfather.
”In all these things we are more than conquerors through Him who loved us.” —Romans 8:31
During our conversation I thanked Jerry for his service. Then he said to me something unusual. “Thank you for how you raised your children. I’ve watched your kids since they came onboard the airplane. Your kids are so well-mannered, so well-behaved. Such good kids.”
At the end of our conversation, I thanked him for serving again. Jerry repeated the same words about my raising my children. Thanking me how I had raised my kids.
Then I got it. What he was telling me. Serving in the military. Raising kids. Do well.
In all these things. In all the stuff that we go through life. We are more than conquerors. Do well. Grow well. Live out your calling well. Live well.
All of us are survivors and conquerors. Live out this Real Truth well.